


Paving the road to hell

by chick_with_wifi



Category: Xena: Warrior Princess
Genre: Canon Backstory, Canon-Typical Violence, F/F, Flashbacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-13
Updated: 2020-07-13
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:34:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25226146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chick_with_wifi/pseuds/chick_with_wifi
Summary: Xena tells Gabrielle about the day her life changed forever, when Cortese attacked her village.
Relationships: Gabrielle/Xena
Kudos: 14





	Paving the road to hell

**Author's Note:**

> This is set after 1x23 Death Mask.  
> Please be aware of the warnings for graphic depictions of violence and major character death.

The fire was beginning to die down so Xena added some more twigs to it. When the flames bloomed back to life, she stared unblinking at them until her eyes began to water. In her peripheral vision she saw Gabrielle sit down beside her, but didn't react.

Gabrielle shifted awkwardly, continually glancing at her then looking away again. Eventually she said, "So that was your brother."

"Yes."

"He's not what I expected. Of course, I didn't know you had an older brother so it's not like I formed an impression before I met him. But still, he's very different to you."

Xena finally turned to look at her, with wry curiosity that prevented her from making eye contact. "You thought he would be like me?"

"Well, nobody is like you," Gabrielle replied with a smile. "But he isn't as brave and heroic as you are."

Xena looked back at the fire, then picked up her sword and began sharpening it with a stone. "He was on his way to becoming what I used to be."

"He ran, didn't he? When your village was attacked, I mean."

"He did. There was a group of them who wouldn't listen to me and took refuge in the hills. To this day, I sometimes wonder if they were brave or foolish."

Gabrielle was quiet for a moment. Then said, "Cortese said he made you. Is that true?"

Xena scoffed quietly. "He's giving himself far too much credit. Picking up a sword that day set me on a dark path, but it was what happened later that took me the rest of the way. It took a long time for me to lose myself in violence. What happened that day was only the start."

Xena heard Gabrielle move closer as she asked, "What did happen that day?"

"I'm sure you've guessed."

"I want to hear the whole story. From you. Please, Xena."

When Xena looked at her, she saw an earnestness in her face that reminded Xena of how little Gabrielle really knew about the world or about how violence could destroy someone's soul. "Alright." She set her sword aside. "When I was seventeen years old, Lyceus and I went to get some food for Mother's inn..."

_"Do we need chicken as well?" Lyceus asked as he piled the loaves of bread into his basket. They were on their usual trip to the shop where they got their food for the next few days._

_"Not today," Xena replied. "But we do need eggs."_

_"Hey, which came first, the chicken or the egg?"_

_Xena groaned. "Not this again." Then she turned to the storeowner. "Ten eggs, please."_

_He counted them out then handed them over. "Is that everything?"_

_"Yeah, thanks. Put it on the tab." Xena packed everything into her basket and put it on her arm while Lyceus picked his up, since it didn't have a handle._

_"Bye," Lyceus said over his shoulder as they left._

_Outside, they began walking back to the inn. Lyceus seemed to be struggling a little with carrying his basket._

_Xena side-eyed him. "I'd ask if you need help, but you should have plenty of practice from carrying this family like you always claim."_

_"Very funny," Lyceus said. "I just need to…" He stopped walking and balanced the basket against his hip while he adjusted his grip. "There we go."_

_She paused, waiting for him. "Sorted?"_

_"Yeah. See?" He lifted the basket with ease and continued walking._

_"I see those big muscles you're so proud of." She used her free hand to pat his bicep, then pointed to his shirt. "You've got a little-" she waited until he looked down, then brought her finger up and flicked his nose. "Gotcha!"_

_He shook his head, trying to seem exasperated but not quite managing it due to his smile. "When are you going to stop doing that?"_

_She grinned. "When you stop falling for it." After walking in silence for a moment he said, "You want to go fishing later? It looks like it's going to be a nice day. And I even have a feeling we might catch Solaris this time."_

_He rolled his eyes, laughing. "Anything's possible."_

_"Yo!" A frantic voice from behind made them stop in their tracks. "Yo, Xena! Lyceus!"_

_Xena spun around and saw one of the men from their village stumbling towards them, clutching his side as blood dripped through his fingers. In his other hand he held a silver mask._

_"Virius," Xena gasped and dropped her basket as she ran over to help him._

_She grabbed one of his arms and put it around her shoulder, then carefully lowered him to the ground with her. He groaned as his torso was jostled._

_"Lyceus, get a healer," Xena said. She moved to tear a strip from the bottom of her dress, but Virius grabbed her arm and pushed it away._

_"No," he said sharply._

_"But I have to-"_

_"It's too late for me," he continued in a thin voice. "He sent me to warn you."_

_Lyceus knelt next to them and put a comforting hand on the man's shoulder. "Who sent you? Warn us about what?"_

_"Cortese." Virius weakly held out the mask and Lyceus took it._

_Xena shared a glance with her brother and saw her own worry reflected back at her. They had both heard the stories about Cortese._

_"He's going to...attack...tonight." With his message delivered, Virius lay his head back and made one last rattling exhale as the life left him._

_"Be at peace," Xena murmured as she closed his eyes. Then she stood up. "We have to gather the village elders, notify his family and warn everyone about Cortese. Come on, we need to hurry."_

_Abandoning the baskets of food, Lyceus and Xena ran back to the inn._

_He was about to enter the building when she took his arm to stop him. "Wait. If I say we should stay and fight, will you join me?" She bit her lip._

_"I will." He held out his hand and they clasped forearms like soldiers._

_Then she pushed open the door and they went in._

_Instantly the room fell silent and Cyrene looked up from the table she was cleaning, eyes widening in horror._

_For a moment Xena wondered if they had somehow heard the news already, then glanced down and realised she had drying blood smeared on her dress. "Virius is dead," she said._

_A few people gasped and a woman Xena recognised as his wife let out a sob._

_Lyceus said, "Before he died, he gave us this." He threw the mask down on the table._

_Whispers rippled across the room. Everyone knew what the Mask of Cortese meant._

_"And he passed on a message," he continued. "Cortese will attack tonight."_

_"We don't have much time," Xena said. "So I need you to gather all the people here as quickly as possible so we can come up with a plan. Go!"_

_The authority in her voice was enough to send them running. Cyrene approached her daughter like she would a wild animal._

_"Xena, what are you doing?" she said softly. "I've never seen you like this before."_

_Xena's shoulders sagged slightly, but she kept her back straight and her chin up. "I'm doing what I have to. To protect Amphipolis."_

_"It's not your responsibility to take charge." Cyrene reached out a hand, but Xena shifted away._

_"And if I don't," she said, "who will?"_

_They stared each other down until the door opened and Toris entered. "What's going on?"_

_"Cortese is attacking," Xena said. "Keep up."_

_"I know that. I meant, what's this about you gathering everyone here? We should be taking refuge in the hills."_

_"So Cortese can destroy our livelihoods while we hide like cowards? I don't think so." Xena folded her arms._

_"It's better than being slaughtered where we stand, like animals."_

_"That's only if we don't fight."_

_"What, because you and Lyceus mess around with swords sometimes, you think you're fit to take on an entire army? And what about the people who have never wielded a weapon in their lives?"_

_"I think we don't have a choice. We're the best chance this village has got."_

_Toris clenched his hands. "I'm not going to let your delusioned overconfidence get people killed."_

_"Oh really?" Xena got into a fighting stance, weight balanced on the balls of her feet and fists at shoulder height._

_But before she could strike a blow, Lyceus put himself between them with his hands up in a placating gesture. "Stop please. Our enemy is Cortese, not each other."_

_Toris scoffed and turned to their brother. "Lyceus, you can't seriously be listening to this nonsense?"_

_"I'm sorry, but this is our home and we have to protect it," he said._

_"Please," Cyrene begged. "Let's just take a moment to think about this."_

_Xena glared. "We don't have a moment, Mother."_

_The door opened again and a group of villagers entered, led by one of the women who had been present when the announcement was made._

_"Take a seat," Xena called to them. "We'll talk strategy when everyone is here."_

_Cyrene came over and put her hands on Xena's shoulders, forcing her to look at her. "Please don't do this."_

_"I have to, Mother."_

_"Nobody will think less of you for coming to the hills."_

_"But I will," Xena said, stepping back._

_Cyrene's hands fell to her sides and she looked at Lyceus. "I know better than to ask if you can talk her out of this, but will you come with us?"_

_He shook his head. "Xena's right. This is something I have to do as well."_

_The rest of the villagers trickled in, until the inn's dining room was the fullest it had ever been._

_When it became clear everyone was present, Xena stepped up onto a table. "Cortese's army will be here soon. They want to raze our village and force us to run. We're not going to let that happen. Anyone capable of wielding a weapon, join me and become my army. We will show him that Amphipolis isn't so easily intimidated."_

_As she climbed down off the table, Toris came forward. "Everyone who wants to live, follow me to the hills now," he announced. "Anyone who doesn't value their life, stay and fight with Xena."_

_She glared at the back of his head. He was so distracted by his own cowardice, he didn't even notice her._

_People discussed the propositions amongst themselves, then slowly each group came to a decision. Gradually, they stood and joined Toris by the door until over half the room were with him. Then he led his group out of the door. Cyrene went with them, although she looked back at Xena and Lyceus on the way out. Her desperation was clear, but Xena's resolve didn't waver. She held her gaze._

_When the door closed behind them, Xena addressed the remaining people. "Gather anything that can be used as a weapon, then join me at the village border. We're going to meet them head on, catch them by surprise."_

_The group voiced their agreement and left for their respective homes._

_Meanwhile, Xena and Lyceus went to their bedrooms. Xena changed into her gold armor and grabbed her sword. She emerged to find her brother similarly prepared, although he didn't have armor._

_"Ready?" he asked._

_"Always," she replied. "Let's go."_

_They joined the group of people on the field that led into the village. Most wielded makeshift weapons, like pitchforks and rakes._

_As soon as they saw Xena and Lyceus, the group parted down the middle and allowed them to walk to the head of their army._

_The sounds of the approaching enemies had been getting louder for a while, but now they were visible. Men in silver masks running towards them in perfect formation._

_Xena shared a look with her brother and twirled her sword with one hand. It was time._

_Fighting began immediately. As Xena swung her sword, she let instinct take over. Somehow she found clarity amid the chaos and, even though it was so different from her sparring sessions with Lyceus, it almost came naturally to her._

_The first man she went up against was considerably taller than her and had a lot of force behind his blows. When she blocked one, it sent a jolt of pain all the way to her shoulder. But she shook it off and parried, moving quickly._

_She just had to keep going until she had an opening. As he spun, preparing to strike, she saw an opportunity to deliver a killing blow. Without hesitation, she drew her sword across his throat. As he made a choking sound and reached up to clutch his neck, she lunged and thrust her sword deep into his chest. The first time she had ever taken a life._

_Before his body had even hit the ground, she kicked him to dislodge her weapon and used the blood-coated sword to defend herself from another attack. Since this man was behind her, she flipped her sword so the blade pointed back and plunged it into him._

_Then she ducked a blow from a third attacker and aimed for their legs, knocking them to the ground where it was easy to finish them._

_In the heat of battle, she lost track of how long she'd been fighting or how many she'd killed. The field was littered with the deceased from both sides, blood staining the ground. Her sword was heavy in her hands and each blow felt like it was pulling the energy out of her, but she didn't stop._

_For a second she found herself without a fight, so she glanced at Lyceus behind her, who was engaged in a battle with one of Cortese's men and holding his own admirably. Then she heard the pounding of hooves and looked to the distance._

_A man on a horse was approaching them. Cortese._

_Swinging her sword wildly in front of her to cut a path, she ran to meet him._

_When he was near enough to look her in the eye, he pulled the reins to stop his horse and surveyed the area. Xena caught her breath and brandished her sword while looking at him with all the hatred she had ever felt._

_Slowly, he met her eyes. After a moment he gave two short whistles._

_The constant clashing of metal stopped and Xena spun around, almost not believing her eyes as the masked men lowered their weapons and began to retreat._

_It was only then that she saw one of them pulling his sword out of Lyceus. Her brother looked at her with his mouth slightly open and she raced over to him, getting there as he dropped to his knees and helping him to lay down._

_"Lyceus," she whispered, patting his cheek. Her view of his face blurred through tears that were threatening to fall. "Stay with me." She tore a strip from his shirt and pressed it against the injury on his side. She needed to stop the bleeding, she knew that much._

_He looked up at her and tried to say something, but he didn't have the strength and a trickle of blood ran from the corner of his mouth._

_"Come on, stay with me." She pressed the cloth tighter against his side and wished there was something else she could do._

_But his injuries were too severe. He smiled at her once, gently, then closed his eyes and passed away._

_Xena stood and shielded her eyes from the setting sun, looking to where Cortese's men were retreating. She spotted the one who had killed Lyceus, who was at the back of the group, and ran after him._

_Once she was close enough, she quickly pulled him back by his shirt and clasped a hand over his mouth. Then she moved her arm so it was wrapped around his chest to keep him still and slit his throat with her sword. His blood coated both her hands but she barely noticed it._

_With that done, she went back to the battlefield and saw a handful of people returning from the hills. Some were tearfully reuniting with survivors and others were sobbing over their fallen loved ones. Amphipolis was barely recognisable._

_As she approached, angry mourners muttered curses in Xena's direction but she barely heard them. She was only interested in one thing. She picked up Lyceus's body and carried him into the inn._

_Carefully, she laid him down on his bed and drew the cover up to his waist. Then she folded his arms over his chest and held his sword for a moment before placing it on top of them._

_Footsteps approached, then slowed as they reached the bed. Cyrene looked at him and realisation visibly dawned on her face as she held in a sob. "Lyceus," she whispered and tenderly laid her hands on his head._

_"I did all I could," Xena said quietly._

_Cyrene looked up at her. "Oh yes," she mocked. "You did all you could." Hatred seeped into her voice. "You raised the army. You talked him into fighting. These-" She walked around the bed and gestured to his chest. "- these may as well be wounds from your sword!" She brought her hand up and slapped Xena's face._

_Xena turned her head, reacting more in surprise than in pain._

_Cyrene's voice began to crack from emotion. "He was the only thing I had left and... you took him from me." She turned away and leaned down to rest her head on his chest, weeping openly. "Lyceus."_

_Unsure of what to do, Xena stood still and looked at the wall. She was just beginning to comprehend that her entire life had fallen apart around her._

_"Get out," Cyrene said after a moment, in a cold voice that Xena had never imagined could come from her mother. "And I don't just mean this house. You aren't welcome in Amphipolis anymore, Xena."_

_So Xena left. Still covered in blood and holding her sword, she walked out of the house without looking back. As she passed the people she'd known all her life, she ignored the fear and hatred in their eyes when they looked at her._

_It didn't matter anyway. Cortese might have turned back now, but he would return and she would be ready. A plan began to form in her mind. She needed an army better than the one she'd just led. And if she took control of the surrounding villages for a buffer after recruiting from them, that would give her more time._

_She would do whatever she had to._

"And I never returned, until the day I met you," Xena finished. She almost didn't dare look at Gabrielle for fear of seeing her reaction, but in the end she had to know.

Gabrielle was resting her chin on her hand and looking at her curiously. "What did you do after you left?"

"I raided the surrounding villages and ended up as a pirate. It started off as protecting Amphipolis, but pretty quickly I lost sight of that and became enamored with the idea of power. Wealth. And doing everything to get them."

"And why -"

Xena held up a hand to stop her. "That's enough storytime for today. It's late, you should get some sleep."

With a nod, Gabrielle stood and went over to her bedroll on the other side of the fire. "Aren't you going to sleep?" she asked as she lay down.

"I will soon." Xena gave her a quick smile, then looked back at the fire and continued to stare into it. As though she would find answers there if she watched long enough.


End file.
